South Carolina Divorce and Family Law » Divorce

Who’s In the Court Room?

Tripp — Wed, 14 Jul 2010 12:37:27 +0000

One of the concerns I hear from clients as we are preparing for both contested and uncontested divorce hearing is who is going to be in the court room with us? Family Courts, except for cases like child abuse and neglect matters, are open to the public and that means any one could be sitting in on your hearing.

The reality is that in nearly every case you will only find a handful of people in the courtroom with you:

Family Court Judge
Court Report – the person who is recording everything that is being said in the courtroom to keep an exact record of what is happening in there.
Deputy/Bailiff
Lawyers
Parties
Witnesses

That’s pretty much it. Occasionally, a law student, newly minted lawyer, or paralegal student will be observing cases as part of a class assignment or bar requirement to practice.

Think Before You File

Tripp — Tue, 13 Jul 2010 19:24:03 +0000

Sometimes it is good to take a deep breath before you go barging ahead in your case. I recently defended a Rule to Show Cause (contempt) hearing for a client filed by his wife. It appeared that she filed it as a retaliation for a letter that I mailed to her on behalf of my client. There were some pretty nasty allegations of contempt in the papers and my client was worried although he believed he had done nothing wrong. Just so you know, a rule to show cause hearing is what a person files to enforce a previous court order. If someone has not done what they were ordered to do by the court and they are found to have willfully disobeyed that order they can be punished by jail time up to one year, fines up to $1,500.00 and up to 300 hours of community service (or any combination of the three). This is serious!

As we walked into the courtroom, my client’s ex-wife appeared cocky and arrogant. She sought the contempt and attorney fees. However, she did not have a strong case. She let emotion and anger rule her rather than common sense. She did not tell the whole story to her attorney who was not ready for our defense. The rule to show cause was dismissed, and to add insult to injury for the ex-wife, she was ordered to pay for my client’s attorney fees for defending the matter.

So, next time you feel like you’ve been done wrong and you’re ready to bring the shock and awe, take a step back, honestly consult with your lawyer and make a plan, but don’t forget to look at the big picture and don’t forget that anything can happen in the courtroom and quickly things can get turned around on you.

Top UpstateFamilyLawBlog.com Posts for April 2010

Tripp — Wed, 05 May 2010 17:58:03 +0000

Here are the top posts from April 2010.

Infidelity Stats: 20% of Men and 10% of Women

Tripp — Sat, 10 Apr 2010 20:22:54 +0000

Came across this infidelity infographic on the Fast Company website this afternoon in an article about Tiger Woods. Interesting…

One interesting stat on this infographic is that 90% of people who have had online affairs get addicted to them and begin another immediately after the current one ends. With the advent of Facebook and other networking sites, it is easier and easier to “hook up” online these days. While an online affair may not be enough to lead to a divorce on adultery grounds in South Carolina, the nature of this activity is such that it is a slippery slope that leads to adultery.

Via: Online Schools

What Happens After my Temporary Hearing?

Tripp — Thu, 08 Apr 2010 19:59:20 +0000

A temporary hearing in a divorce case can set the tone for the rest of the matter. It is probably good to note right here that the decision made by a judge at a temporary hearing is temporary in nature (hence the name) and it carries no weight as far as what the trial judge may or may not rule on. Therefore, if you are ruled against at the temporary hearing it isn’t the end of the world. However, when a judge rules for or against a person at a temporary hearing it seems to give each party some false sense of power or weakness in the case.

After your temporary hearing a temporary order will be prepared and signed by the judge and that sets the standard of conduct for the remainder of the litigation. Generally, in this period between the temporary hearing and the final hearing the parties will engage in discovery, potentially take depositions of key witnesses, mediate the case, and attempt to reach a negotiated settlement. If there are minor children involved, a guardian ad litem will be appointed who will perform an investigation into the issues surrounding the minor children.

This process can take several months. Often, depending on the complexity of the case, it can last over a year. The final phase before the final hearing is the trial preparation phase where you and your lawyer will be preparing for trial by meeting with witnesses, preparing any necessary witness subpoenas, creating trial exhibits, etc. All of this leads up to the final hearing in your case.

Top UpstateFamilyLawBlog.com Posts for March 2010

Tripp — Fri, 02 Apr 2010 11:30:45 +0000

In case you missed them, here are the top 10 posts from this blog in March 2010 (according to Google Analytics). And no, I’m not getting anything from Google for saying that.

Just for kicks, here are some of the top keywords used to find UpstateFamilyLawBlog this month:

how long does it take to get a divorce in south carolina
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tripp atkins greenville sc
sc dss advice
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how long does an uncontested divorce take in south carolina
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Is Your Facebook Page Going to Be Used Against You in Your Divorce?

Tripp — Tue, 23 Mar 2010 15:01:30 +0000

A few weeks ago I attended a continuing legal education seminar and one of the topics of discussion was finding information about a party using the internet. Now this isn’t any deep private investigator stuff this is using public information like someone’s public Facebook, MySpace, LinkedIn and Twitter profiles to learn about a person. The speaker was really more experienced in using these sites to gain information about parties to injury cases, but I have seen it used in divorce and child custody matters as well.

There are tons of stories out there of old high-school sweethearts rekindling their relationships on Facebook with current marriages left in the dust. But, how can Facebook or Twitter be used against you in a divorce or child custody case? I’ve even seen a newspaper article from the UK where a wife found out that her husband was divorcing her because he changed his marital status on Facebook.

If your spouse suspects that you are cheating on him/her they could go to your social media accounts and print out the conversations and photographs you have put up there for the world to see. Those conversations can be pretty damning – especially if they are pulled out of context. The photographs can also be pretty harmful. Last year, I worked on a child custody case and represented the father. The mother tried to use photos and comments on his Facebook and MySpace accounts showing him partying and drinking to prove that he was a bad father. I have used Facebook conversations and photos to help prove adultery in divorce cases.

One way to find information about your spouse is to use an online tool called Flowtown. Flowtown lets you enter an e-mail address and it shows you where that person is interacting with social media online.

Is there evidence that can be used against you on your Facebook page?

If you use Facebook or other social media sites and you are facing divorce, a child custody suit or other legal matter, here are some resources for you to check out form other legal blogs:

Facebook No-No’s for Divorcing Couples by Ben Stevens at www.SCfamilylaw.com
How to Find the Opposing Party on Facebook by Lee Rosen at Divorce Discourse
Using Social Networks to Gather Evidence by the Trial Technologist’s View
Social Networking Sites can Provide Key Evidence by Dan Berexa at Dan Berexa’s Tennessee Law Blog
Florida Couples try to Sway Divorce Proceedings with Evidence from Facebook by Keith Maynard at the Jacksonville Divorce Lawyer Blog.
Here’s a great video by Lee Rosen about this topic as well:

Backing up Financial Information Before You Go

Tripp — Mon, 08 Mar 2010 12:00:07 +0000

If you are contemplating leaving your marriage you may consider taking a few steps before breaking the news to your spouse or leaving the house to make sure you protect yourself and your financial interests. South Carolina family courts are courts of equity when it comes to dividing up marital assets. But before you can divide up assets and debts you must be able to identify all of those assets debts and determine which portion of them are marital and non-marital. You may find that once you break the news to your spouse about the impending divorce communication may break down and walls of protection may go up around both of you. Before that happens you should attempt to gather as much information about your family finances as possible. Here are some tips:

Gather copies of tax returns;
Gather copies of financial statements;
Gather copies of insurance policies (whether they are term or whole life policies with a cash value and if they have a cash value, what it currently is).
Inventories of property in the house – using a video camera to record a walk-through of the house is a great way to do this to make sure you don’t forget anything.
Inventories of property in safe-deposit boxes (though you should take a witness with you to (1) verify what is in there when you went and (2) verify that you did not remove anything from the box)
Retirement account statements.
Appraisals of real estate and personal property like jewelry, art, etc.
Copies of paystubs for you and your spouse for the year-to-date

Of course all of this information can theoretically be gathered in the discovery phase of your divorce litigation you can save a lot of time and a lot of money (on attorney fees) by having all of this information pulled together from the beginning. Not only will you save yourself money on attorney fees, but you put yourself and your attorney in a better position when it comes to negotiating prior to and arguing at a temporary hearing.

Another thing that will come of this information is that the more your specific knowledge your attorney has about your case the better he/she will be able to advise you about the likely outcomes or the best courses of action for you with less assumption.

Hat tip to the Ohio Family Law Blog for the tips in this post from their post 12 Proactive Steps to Take If You are Contemplating Divorce.

Where can I find an Uncontested Divorce?

Filing Bankruptcy Can Improve Your Family Life

Tripp — Wed, 03 Mar 2010 17:42:31 +0000

Parenting and stress go hand-in-hand. Mix in being buried in debt, and the financial pressures can begin taking a toll on your family, your health, and your emotional well-being.

Going through tough financial times increases tension within the family and interferes with your relationship with your children and your spouse. Don’t let the situation make you feel cut off from your family.

Parenting is all about teaching your children. Share financial issues with your children much as you can, depending on their age. Opening up the lines of communication will not only keep you connected to them, but may also provide an opportunity to teach them about finances.

When you first realize you are in over your head and can’t make your payments, contact your creditors and try to negotiate repayment plans with you. Unfortunately, this is easier said than done.

If you can’t restructure your debts, you should explore bankruptcy to relieve your financial stress. Bankruptcy was designed to help individuals stabilize their finances and get out from under their financial burden by protecting their property, lowering their stress levels, and allowing them to sleep at night.

Keep in mind that filing bankruptcy is not the problem. The problem is not being able to pay your bills and not being able to provide for your family. This financial pressure causes the stress and anxiety to build. All this spills over into your family relationships.

To decide whether bankruptcy is right for you, contact an experienced bankruptcy lawyer who can help you navigate the complicated bankruptcy process and advise you about whether Chapter 7 (“straight bankruptcy”) or Chapter 13 (“reorganization bankruptcy”) is best for you.

Once you have gone through the bankruptcy process, rejoice in new beginnings. You went through bankruptcy to get to a fresh start. Now, begin by developing a sound financial plan that will protect your finances and your sanity. Establish a savings plan that will allow you to better absorb financial strain and plan for your family’s future. Once your present situation is under control, you can begin to look to the future and set aside money for your financial goals.

But What If I’m Getting a Divorce?

Sometimes divorce is inevitable. I practiced family law for ten years, so I know that debt not only can cause divorce but can also cause divorce proceedings to be more difficult than they would otherwise be.

She says he spent too much. He says she spent too much. And neither can afford the credit card payments. The divorce case can come to standstill over debt.

If that’s the case, both spouses should consider bankruptcy. Getting rid of debt means one less thing to fight over, and that’s a good thing for your divorce case.

If you are married, you can file a joint bankruptcy case with your spouse. Depending on your situation, you may even be able to use the same bankruptcy lawyer to do this. Much hinges on whether there is any conflict of interest in having the same attorney represent you in your bankruptcy case—and that depends on the facts of your case.

By using bankruptcy to get your financial house in order, you can reduce your stress, enjoy time with your family, and free up your mind to start planning for your future.

Russell A. DeMott is a Charleston, South Carolina bankruptcy lawyer.

Divorce for No Sex in Over 1 Year

Tripp — Thu, 11 Feb 2010 13:05:17 +0000

When things get sour in a marriage one of the first things usually to go is sex and usually one of the parties (not always the guy!) takes it personally and gets pretty upset about it. I have heard it termed that the withholding party was not living up to their “Marriage Contract”. But can you get a divorce on that ground? A lot of times, people begin to think that is a really good reason for a divorce and an even better reason for their spouse to get nothing (property division and alimony) in the divorce.

In Maryland, two legislators have filed a bill that, if passed, would allow a divorce on the grounds of no sex for a year. Alleging that it would ease the financial burdens on families who want a divorce but can’t afford to support two households. (The finanical dilemma of supporting two households after a separation is a huge problem in almost any divorce).

But, in South Carolina the no sex argument is not going to work to get you a divorce. Basically, you are still stuck with the same five options for divorce grounds: physical cruelty, habitual drunkenness, abandonment, adultery and the no fault ground of living in separate residences for more than one year (which by default also means no sex for more than one year).